Gone Girl

I don't know what's more terrifying; the path marriage takes the characters down or the idea of this brilliant screenplay and Rosamund Pike's performance not getting nominated.

4/4

Annabelle

By having lead performances as wooden and scares as cheap as the title character, Annabelle is an absolute dummy.

1/4

Boyhood

Beautiful, flawlessly acted, and it will ring true for anyone especially those who grew up in modern times. Brilliant.

4/4

Tusk

If this was actually based on true events (I always take this line with a grain of salt), then I can see why Kevin Smith wanted to take this to the big screen but to say the approach was off is an understatement. There's just no sense of tone or effectiveness here.

Justin Long's character Wallace,  is such an oddity. He's given absolutely no redeeming qualities or humor in his early scenes so are we really supposed to give a Shit when he is eventually turned into a walrus by a crazed ex - seaman? Is it supposed to be a funny situation or a disturbing one like The Human Centipede? I get the feeling it was more of the latter but Michael Parks' performance as the antagonist is so campy nothing registers as frightening. 

It feels like such a waste of time with no merit as a horror movie or comedy, so many scenes register as completely blank and you're wondering what you're supposed to get from them, if anything.  The ridiculously terrible makeup and costume used later on summarizes Tusk in a nutshell; ugly and full of blubber.

0/4

The Other Woman

It's such an oddity when a movie with a theme of such overriding female empowerment turns out being so misogynistic and flat-out embarassing to females. I have to wonder if the screenwriters have ever met any woman in life. And if they were women, if they even considered thinking about any women on this planet when they wrote these characters.

Cameron Diaz's character finds out that her dream boyfriend is married to Leslie Mann's character. After a meeting or two, they are best friends (because that totally happens) and both then find out that their dream man has a dream mistress played by Kate Upton.

The characterization of the female characters sinks this already broken ship. The transition from hating each other to revenge buddies feels so rushed and forced I wondered at times if reels were missing from the movie. Diaz's character is a stiff, Mann's belongs in an institution,  Upton's is completely vacuous.  So we're supposed to like these people? Why? Because none of them have the brains to just move on? And the less said about Nicki Minaj's complete waste of film role...the better.

All of their hijinks feel terribly amateurish as well.  Giving someone laxatives and filming it isn't funny. Giving a male character female hormones to make his tits bigger isn't funny. No matter what the women go through you'll leave this movie feeling like you've been screwed over the hardest.

0/4